Monday, November 19, 2007

Being Assertive: 4th element revised

Hey there! Good to see you again. I've got something mind-bottling for you today...

Here's a good metaphor: Would you get on a train if you didn't know where it was going?

Some say yes, some say no. Depends on how adventurous you're feeling at the time. But what if you knew it was going somewhere fun and exciting? You'd probably go.

Same thing applies in this game of life. When you're interacting with someone, it's important to be assertive about your intentions. When i learned about the 4th element (relationship expectations) i realized that women want to know where the interaction is heading. I learned that you could tell the truth, women would get over it, and you'd have a happy relationship.

When i told people about it, including some guys i know who are quite loved by women, their reaction was negative: they totally didn't believe that you could tell the truth and still have the relationship you want.

Well, i got it right, mostly.

You can indeed tell the truth, but it doesn't have to be so serious or awkward. In fact, as a good friend says, "it's only as awkward as you make it." OR you CAN 'lie'.

But it's not the kind of lie that is meant to deceive, rather it's the kind of lie that is meant to communicate that the truth simply doesn't matter. "We're gonna get married and have great-grandkids." "We're gonna do the nasty then you can adopt multicultural kids and i'll raise them like Brad and Angelina." What this says is, 'Don't worry about it, we're having fun right now and that's what matters. Now where were we?'

OR you can tell her the bald truth: "i'll take you home and see how many times i can make your legs shake."

Either way, have some fun with it. But don't ever be afraid to communicate your interest. As long as you're coming from the right place, you have nothing to worry about. True, you recognize their value, but you are also a person of value and you're willing to walk away at the drop of a hat at any moment because you don't actually NEED them to feel valuable.

So sure, i walk up to a girl and communicate a shitload of interest. Then i'll turn my back and walk away and do it again to another girl. I'm fickle like that. Everyone has value, and it doesn't take me long to see someone's uniqueness. But just because i'm sexual doesn't mean i have sex; i'm selective.

Try it, it's awesome.

cheers!
JDanger

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