Rules to Live By

If you want to be confident and secure, have self-esteem and stop deriving your value from other people, be internally validated and answer only to yourself, you have to actually have something to answer to.

I'll find this quote that will help this make more sense and post that too, but in the mean time, here's my list of things to answer to for MYSELF. That way, I don't care about others' judgments of me, as long as I'm living by my rules and being who I want to be, I'm good. I have this posted on my wall and I read it often.

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Goals

Have fun
Explore
Expand
Enjoy myself
Enjoy the process
Enjoy the journey

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Ways to Live

Core Confidence
Give Value
Be Assertive
Be Unreactive

Commit to Consistency
Live and Learn
Esteem reigns supreme
Everyone has value

Alpha male
High value male
A guy with standards and rules
Giver of value

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Who I Am - Julian Kahlil Saint Clair

Playful/Fun
Daring/Adventurous
Leading/Dominant
Magnetic/Seductive
Clever/Wise
Honest/Uninhibited
Edgy/Bold
Appreciative/Easy Going
Optimistic/Dreaming
Inspiring/Encouraging

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My RULES

Be respectful of time and effort
Be appreciative of resources
Be a GIVER and not a TAKER
Be positive
Be physically comfortable
Be responsible
Be open to learn

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Ideal qualities I want to embody - extended version of "Who I Am"

Fun
Fun Loving
Outgoing
Extroverted
Introspective
Seeking New Experiences
Leader
Facilitator
Inspirational
Optimistic
Positive Outlook
Hard Working
Willing to take RISKS
Assertive
Dominant
Willing to SPEAK UP
Confident
HOT
Sexy
Sexual
Unafraid to BE MYSELF
Unafraid to be EXPRESSIVE
Easy going
Playful
Magnetic
Honest
Uninhibited
Clever
Concise (ha!)
Wise
Intelligent
Friendly
Easy to talk to
FUN to talk to
Giver of Value
Grounded
Charming
Down to Earth
Flattering
Relaxed
Edgy
Seductive
Attractive
Worldly
Trustworthy
Well Rounded
Understanding
APPRECIATIVE
A Dreamer
A CLOSER
Daring
Courageous
Bold
Abundance Mentality
Generous
Encouraging
A Gentleman
Open Minded
Receptive
Secure
Fast Learner

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This list grows all the time and I try to think of better ways to organize it and things to add. I very very very strongly recommend EVERYONE make a list - remember that it's a list of WHO YOU WANT TO BE, not 'who you are currently', your IDEAL SELF, not your 'actual self'.

The first step to being your ideal self is knowing who you want to be.

When you're first making your list, make it LOOONG. Write down everything you can possibly think of even if it sounds repetitive. Later, try to condense it into a shorter version (for me that's my "Who I Am" section), which will be easier to remember.

The important thing is to come up with a list that rings true for YOU.

However, if any of the things on mine sound good to you, feel free to use them as your own - some of the stuff I got from other people as well. That's part of being open minded and a fast learner;) Take what works for you and discard the rest.

cheers,
JDanger