Monday, November 19, 2007

Being Assertive: 4th element revised

Hey there! Good to see you again. I've got something mind-bottling for you today...

Here's a good metaphor: Would you get on a train if you didn't know where it was going?

Some say yes, some say no. Depends on how adventurous you're feeling at the time. But what if you knew it was going somewhere fun and exciting? You'd probably go.

Same thing applies in this game of life. When you're interacting with someone, it's important to be assertive about your intentions. When i learned about the 4th element (relationship expectations) i realized that women want to know where the interaction is heading. I learned that you could tell the truth, women would get over it, and you'd have a happy relationship.

When i told people about it, including some guys i know who are quite loved by women, their reaction was negative: they totally didn't believe that you could tell the truth and still have the relationship you want.

Well, i got it right, mostly.

You can indeed tell the truth, but it doesn't have to be so serious or awkward. In fact, as a good friend says, "it's only as awkward as you make it." OR you CAN 'lie'.

But it's not the kind of lie that is meant to deceive, rather it's the kind of lie that is meant to communicate that the truth simply doesn't matter. "We're gonna get married and have great-grandkids." "We're gonna do the nasty then you can adopt multicultural kids and i'll raise them like Brad and Angelina." What this says is, 'Don't worry about it, we're having fun right now and that's what matters. Now where were we?'

OR you can tell her the bald truth: "i'll take you home and see how many times i can make your legs shake."

Either way, have some fun with it. But don't ever be afraid to communicate your interest. As long as you're coming from the right place, you have nothing to worry about. True, you recognize their value, but you are also a person of value and you're willing to walk away at the drop of a hat at any moment because you don't actually NEED them to feel valuable.

So sure, i walk up to a girl and communicate a shitload of interest. Then i'll turn my back and walk away and do it again to another girl. I'm fickle like that. Everyone has value, and it doesn't take me long to see someone's uniqueness. But just because i'm sexual doesn't mean i have sex; i'm selective.

Try it, it's awesome.


Friday, November 16, 2007

Being Selective and Discrete

Hi guys! Today i wanted to briefly discuss two important qualifiers: being Selective and Discrete, because i've really internalized these two traits lately.

I mean, i've always BEEN selective and discrete, but i never really understood what that meant and how to communicate it, until recently.

Sometimes it's easier to figure things out by looking at it backwards: what if i WASN'T selective and discrete? What does that say about me?

If i weren't selective it says that i'll take anything that comes my way. I'm desperate and needy.

If i weren't discrete that means i'm telling everyone all of my business. That means i'm in dire need of attention to make me feel valuable.

Both of those things imply that deep down inside i feel like i'm worthless.

Well, when you look at it like that, DUH. Of course the opposite sex isn't interested in someone who's not selective or discrete (assuming they are also selective and discrete).

So once your internal compass is aligned and you're coming from the right place, make sure you're communicating these two qualities about yourself. And plz don't try to fake it - the opposite sex is WAAAY too savvy. It's all in the nonverbals.

cheers mates,

Saturday, November 10, 2007

The Process: Learning and Breaking All the Rules

The Process...

Hello dearest of friends. I've been thinking lately about how to get from point A to point B in this game. There's some sort of process involved, or so it seems. Can it be denied? Can it be skipped? Is there a shortcut?

Possibly. Probably. But it's HARDER, it takes more dedication and perserverence and straight up FAITH that it will work. Courage and confidence that it will work. Determination.

What's the end goal?

The end goal is an understanding of the social matrix and the ability to break free of it and do whatever we want with it, if we so desire.

Some people learn some of the rules and become manipulators. This is the dark side.

Others are well-rounded, grounded, spiritually centered people who are GOOD people and tired of being trapped in the matrix. They become leaders of men, protectors of loved ones, etc etc. This is the good side. This is the way of the jedi.

There are 3 things to learn to complete your game, and this goes for both guys and girls:

How to have value (attract)
How to understand others value (comfort)
How to give value (seduce)

If you're not attractive people basically won't even talk to you and you'll never learn how to build rapport and get to know people in comfort. Likewise with seduction: if you have no value and you're trying to 'give' value it comes off as the OPPOSITE and you seem needy/reaction-seeking like a super-nerd giving a pretty girl a compliment. Therefore, it seems you HAVE to go through the process of learning attraction then comfort then seduction.

It's good to start off with at least some cursory knowledge of all 3 things so that, while you work on one, if you find yourself in a more advanced stage, you know SOMETHING about it. This was how i learned. And it was definitely a process.

But now that i've learned all of these basic areas of the social matrix i'm finding that there are other crucial rules that i was never taught and exactly how to bend and break them. The more i learn, the more i build this overall picture that all it comes down to is one thing:

Be a fucking MAN.

Stop being a pussydick and man the F up. Ask yourself, what would a MAN do in this situation?

Internalize all of the goodness of game.

Be attractive
Be confident
Be assertive
Be touchy
Be sexual
Be funny (to YOURSELF)
Be unreactive (hold your frame)
Be smiling
Be nonchalant
Be bold
Be daring
Be courageous


Meanwhile, here are a few of those crucial social rules i've learned the past few months, and here's how to break them.:

The Social Rules:

Keep the keepers
Keep your hands to yourself
Intimacy needs privacy
Being a player is bad
Don't tell her you want her

#1) We Date People We Like

If you don't want a relationship don't do any 'relationship' stuff throughout those 3 stages. do NOT paint a picture that says, 'i'm a nice person who just wants to find that sweet someone and settle down for a while'. Don't tell them anything that they'd LOVE to tell their mom, follow me? "He's a chiropractor" "He's in college" "He's my age" "He wants to be a veterenarian"

CUT THAT SHIT OUT! If they start to 'like' you too much then they're gonna wanna date you. If that's what you want, by all means go for it. Just understand the rule and know what you're doing. Next!

#2) Escalate or Die

So you've created attraction. Good for you. But guess what? It's literally going NOWHERE unless you escalate. Always be escalating. All of that talking is useless bullshit until the two of you are touching.

And don't hesitate to escalate further, don't be satisfied with your hand on her knee. KEEP GOING. Sure she might say 'omg what are you doing?! lol!' or playfully hit you and stuff, doesn't mean she wants you to stop. If you haven't been slapped, you're not out of line.

Oh, and ladies, if we're really out of line, please slap us.

#3) It Doesn't Matter Who's Around

Anytiiimmmme.... or any plaaace iiiii don't care who's arooouunnnd!

Take a lesson from Janet Jackson: stop caring who's around. If you don't care, the person you're with won't care. Be adventurous! Be spontaneous! And use protection. I carry condoms in my pocket at all times. Why? Am i planning on having sex? No. But i'm planning on being spontaneous.

This is such an important lesson to learn and it goes hand in hand with #2 because you can't let ANYTHING stop you from escalating. There is no such thing as bad logistics: there are bathrooms, alleyways, closets, cars, and dark corners. The best sex isn't always in the bedroom.

#4) Be a Player

Yes, i know. Contrary to popular belief, being a player is NOT a bad thing. BUT, being a player doesn't mean you have endless women, it means you CAN have endless women but you choose to only have 'several' women. I can't stress this enough, but BE SELECTIVE.

There will come a point where the opposite sex will see your seductive prowess and feel a little fear: do they do this with ALL the girls?

To this my response is, "just because i'm sexual doesn't mean i have sex."

It's of the utmost importance to communicate to the opposite sex that you're SELECTIVE and DISCRETE.

#5) Communicate Sexual Interest

"You want to have sex with me don't you?" What would you say in this situation? This is the ULTIMATE sexual test for pussydicks. This is like her saying, 'are you gonna man the fuck up or what?'

So, there's only one proper way to reply to this: f*ck yes.

But remember that throughout all of this, coming from the right place is where it all starts. So if you come from a place of NEEDINESS, she'll see it. But if not, you're good. Realize deeply that you don't need her pussy to have a good orgasm. You don't need her to feel validated. You don't NEED her for anything - you can take it or leave it, no big deal. Same thing goes for ladies: neediness grosses us out.

Don't be needy when communicating sexual desire, just be assertive.

Ok, enough of that. I'm gonna go grab a bite to eat and maybe hit the gym and the mall before a night of glorious adventure starts anew. I encourage you to do the same, lets explore this world together.